Marriage - What Is It Really About?


Marriage. Wikipedia defines marriage as a socially or ritually recognized union or legal contract between spouses that establishes rights and obligations between them, between them and their children, and between them and their in-laws...it is principally an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually sexual, are acknowledged. What a worldly definition, and a sad one.

Two things that jump out to me with the above definition of marriage are 'rights and obligations' as well as the comment about how it is an acknowledgment of a sexual relationship. That's not what marriage is about! For one, I don't consider myself as having any 'rights' or 'obligations' in my marriage. It's about a partnership - becoming one. Secondly, marriage isn't just an acknowledgement of a relationship, more so, that of a sexual relationship. This being said, what is marriage really about?

Marriage: What Is It Really About?

What we really have to look at is what God's purpose is for marriage. A quick note - the below is what my husband and I discussed through pre-marital counseling {almost 3 years ago!!}. It was one of the best things we did in preparation for marriage and we still carry those lessons with us to this day.

Let's look at the beginning:
"Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him." (Genesis 2:18 ESV)
We were created for Companionship! A loving relationship; a relationship where we can freely express our love for each other.

Look at that verse again:
"...I will make him a helper fit for him." (Genesis 2:18 ESV)
We were created to Complete each other. This doesn't mean we have rights and obligations to each other. In marriage, we become one.
"Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24 ESV; emphasis added)
 Most importantly, though, we were created in the Image of Christ.
"Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness'....So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." (Genesis 1:26, 27)
We need to remember that God's primary marriage is for us to be more Christ-like. I love the image of a marriage illustrated as a triangle. The husband and wife are the two base points, with God at the top point. In marriage, the closer a husband and wife moves toward God, the closer they draw toward each other. Christ needs to be at the center of our marriage.

Let's not let the world define our marriages. I love this definition of marriage:
"Marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman in which they promise to be a faithful husband and a faithful wife in a new one-flesh union as long as they both shall live. This covenant, sealed with solemn vows and sexual union, is designed to showcase the covenant-keeping grace of God."
Let's remember that marriage is a model of Christ and the Church.

What does a biblical marriage mean to you? Pleas share in the comments below!

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  1. I really enjoyed reading your post! People don't always look at marriage as a spiritual thing, but God definitely designed it for a purpose. Partnering with someone with different attributes, tastes, preferences definitely helps us become more Christ-like as we learn to submit and compromise.

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    1. Thank you so much! I completely agree with you, in learning compromise and submission to my husband, it showed me how much more important it is to do to Christ.

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  2. My fiancé and I just had our first premarital counseling session last week and it was so good! We talked a lot about how marriage is a covenant and not a contract. I'm excited for the way that these sessions will help shape our marriage. I'm also just starting to read Tim Keller's The Meaning of Marriage and it's a great book!

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    1. That is such a good book - I have gifted it as an engagement gift to a few couples! Covenant verses contract was also a big topic when we went through our pre-marital counseling. Congrats on your engagement!

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  3. My husband and I learned many of the same lessons in our premarital counseling sessions nearly 17 years ago. These are some of the same principles we try to teach couples when we lead premarital counseling now. I love Ecclesiastes 4:12, "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." When we allow God to be the 3rd strand in our marriage it strengthens our union far more than anything we could do on our own!

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    1. I love that verse! We have it hanging in our living room to remind us daily :)

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  4. I agree! It's so sad what the meaning of marriage has become today. It's important to remember that God is at the center! Thank you for sharing this at Motivational Monday! We'd love to have you back on Sunday at 6pm. Hope your weekend is going great! :)

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